the day my grandmother moved back to hargeisa she asked me to take a walk with her. i can’t remember what day of the week she left or what month or even what year, but i remember i was young and i know it’s been too long since i’ve last seen her.
it was a summer day, i know this because in the…
How I felt when I first joined Tumblr:
in our own ways,
we all break.
it is okay
to hold your heart outside of your body
at a time.
This is why I don’t trust that typically white non-Muslim approach of wearing a hijab for one day to experience what it’s like to be a Muslim woman. First, it’s insincere. Secondly, it’s not authentic because it’s a compartmentalized approach. A pregnant Muslim woman lost her baby after being attacked by two men in Paris. I am waiting for every single “secular” feminist to explain to me how misogyny is “less rampant” in secular countries. I am also waiting for every supporter of Femen/etc to explain to me how their praxis fits into an environment where immigrants of color - specifically - are attacked mercilessly for their appearance, their apparel. I want to understand how their politics of subverting patriarchy is effective if they can be so easily co-opted by xenophobes throughout the region. I am beyond done with every single blind licking and lapping up of secular happiness especially by European feminists who assume liberation happens through assimilating nudity.
Why wait the extra minutes to text someone back and a week to return a phone call and years playing hard to get when we know that life isn’t the kindest. Everyone’s life has been hard enough already. If you miss someone, call. Take them out for tea. Listen to their heartbeat. Draw love marks with your words all over their heart. Don’t hold back. Say I love you when it’s the most inconvenient. Speak if you are bothered. Explain yourself if you need to be understood. Smile. It is hard to watch how we go out of your way to hurt each other, when life hurts enough already. We make such a game of love, like we are playing cards with our wounds and trying to be the first to quit without a broken heart.
“We should all be feminists” TedxTalk by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
This talk is honestly just incredible. As a Nigerian and a fellow Igbo as well, it is beyond moving to see someone like Adichie so eloquently articulate and expound on sexism and the virulent power of patriarchy in the world at large and specifically in the context of her life as an Igbo woman growing up in Nigeria as well. She points out the problems we have in Nigerian and Igbo culture today without pulling punches, and links it into these larger systems of oppression that affect woman globally. Oppression being cast as ”tradition” and a “part of our culture” is not excusable and is just wrong, and as she puts it so well:
“So what is the point of culture… culture is really about preservation and continuity of people… culture does not make people; people make culture. So if it is in fact true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we must make it our culture”
She also calls out the fuckery of MOC who blatantly ignore the intersectional experiences of WOC!
This is amazing, and Adichie takes you on a journey with her before hitting homerun after homerun in the second half of the talk.The only bone I have to pick is with her saying that men “should be feminists as well.” I feel like it’s very inappropriate for us as men to colonize female spaces, and a “male feminist” is a useless term for someone who should just say that he is a “man actually trying to be a decent human being” instead.
Besides that, though, and ending by talking about a “masculine male feminist” (cringe) which are points she touches on just right at the end, I absolutely love this and encourage everyone to grab some popcorn and watch it! She calls it like it is, and I’m so proud as an Igbo person as well. Adichie is just so incredible, smart, funny, witty and on point, and I’m going to have to look for some of her books to read now too!
I think it’s important for men to understand and distinguish that when women—specially women of color—say “men should be feminists”, we’re not saying ‘colonize’ and overwhelm women’s spaces, we’re saying embrace feminist ideals, practice feminist ideals. Patricia Hill-Collin’s talks a lot about this in “Black Feminist Thought”.
So in that sense and in the sense Adichi, I believe, means it is in that respect.
Thanks so much for sharing, and I totally agree with you when it’s framed like that. Thanks so much for providing additional context!
“After this I go to work at a pizza shop. My wife and I were college professors in Bangladesh. I taught accounting. But one dollar in America becomes eighty dollars when we send it back home.”
People forget, when immigrants come to this country they start from scratch. They could have been lawyers in their home country, but in the US..it means nothing. You think a HS diploma from Bangladesh means anything in this country? My mom was a top student in the country, went to all the best school and got the best of everything…but when she got here it meant squat and she was cleaning other people’s homes and scrubbing their toilets. This is why I get pissed of when people talk smack about immigrants. They at least are doing something…..heading for a goal..making sacrifices…what are you doing with your life?
^ My parents were college-educated teachers in their home country and came to the U.S. with nothing but empty pockets, a dash of hope, and a belief in God. They also scrubbed toilets in people’s homes to make enough to provide for their children, and that’s probably not something a lot of educated professionals would be able to do. I know I wouldn’t be able to do it. Pride would get in the way.
THIS IS TOO IMPORTANT.
Yep. People do forget this. My mother got two degrees in mathematic and in physics in el salvador but when she came to the US she wound up working as a seamstress for $5 an hour. People forget the sacrifices that immigrants make. It’s infuriating.
- Me When I Get Paid: I make it rain, I make it rain, I make it rain on these hoes!
- Me After Paying Bills: I'm gonna pop some tags only got 20 dollas in my pocket.
do you ever feel like you’re just sort of
like all your friends go out and do things and get into relationships and like people that like them back and have fun and do stupid things with their best friends and instead of doing all that you’re just sort of this mildly entertaining thing that people take an interest in once in a while but they wouldn’t really care if it was gone
like you just sort of exist but you don’t really mean anything
then i remember someone who I mean something to.
… me, basically.
Good Secret Bad Secret - Girls Handclapping Song! (by createfuturegood)
Protect girls against abuse
Get it girls! Let em know.
Go on girls. If this ain’t revolutionary then idk what is!
*Cries* my heart
I’m full on weeping here. This is so awesome!
i weep because there is a reason and need for a song like this.